Today we remember and celebrate the birth of Jesus, and how his lessons of love shine bright through the ages. All over the world, different peoples and cultures join together to remember the birth of this bright light in the midst of darkness.
Our story starts out with homeless travellers, forced by colonisers and imperialists to return to a town that was no longer home. For them, this meant a winter’s nights spent in a stable.
No central heating (possibly no heating at all). No electricity or running water. Instead, they put up with straw beds, the smell of dung and moisture, and possibly leaks in the roof and a cold wind chill.
It was only slightly better than staying outdoors.
We’re told that Mary gave birth in these conditions. Forget
the midwife, doctor or antibiotics
warm water and clean towels
another pair of hands to help Joseph clean up the baby after it was born
close family and friends to help out and bring a caserole.
Instead, it is a very humble birth, as you might find in an indigenous village of the third world, yet devoid the community support.
This is the birth that we celebrate at Christmas.
A birth of humility, yet full of a mother’s love and the faith of strangers.
A birth that changed the world, how we see God, and even how we interact with God.
From these humble beginnings, we find ourselves two thousand years later here in this Church remembering the meaning of Christmas.
The Radiance of Faith
In Luke we read that following the birth of Jesus, an angel appeared to shepherds, watching their sheep in the fields around Bethlehem.
Perhaps you would be more acquainted with cowboys than shepherds, unless you live in the outback of Australia, the highlands of Scotland or various parts of the Middle East.
But most of us know that these shepherds were likely in worse conditions than Mary and Joseph who were in the stable. They were likely under the stars, without a roof or tent over their heads. Exposed to the elements in the middle of winter.
And it’s to these people that the angel appears with the good news of the birth of the Messiah.
The angel didn’t appear to the priests and pharisees. He didn’t go to the palace and announce the birth to the king or to Pontius Pilate as the representative of Rome in Judea.
Instead, the good news was shared with lowly shepherds.
In what was undoubtedly a terrifying way. Great light and fanfare on a quiet night in the mountains.
Scared much?
And yet, what was the response of the shepherds after overcoming their fear?
Rejoicing!
More importantly: they responded with action.
They left their flocks and went straight to visit Mary, Joseph and Jesus. Without waiting.
This is their example to us of the radiance of faith.
Hearing. Believing. Taking action based on that faith and belief.
So, for each of us today, let’s take a moment to reflect on our faith in action.
How do we live a life of faith?
Titus tells us
For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation to all, training us to renounce impiety and worldly passions and in the present age to live lives that are self-controlled, upright, and godly,
Titus 2: 11-12
The grace of God appears
It all starts with Divine grace. Not because we deserve it or have worked for it. Simple a Divine gift from above.
We are merely asked to accept it.
Because we have accepted this Divine Love, we can begin to change our habits and way of being.
Training us
Titus then goes on to say that this grace of God, this salvation, trains us. The grace is instantaneous.
But our transformation is something that we work on.
We are trained in this, day by day.
What we renounce or quit
We start by choosing to renounce those habits and ways of living that leave us in the darkness. Titus calls these worldly passions.
Walking in the light of love is a choice. A choice we make daily.
And the principal part of that choice is to quit those practices, attitudes and ways of living that keep us chained.
This is different for each person. Perhaps it’s gluttony or being lazy. For others, it is a shopping addiction or smoking. And yet, for another, it might be bitterness and hate.
We start by choosing to let go, renounce and quit.
The new habits we adopt
Then, we open our time, energy and focus up to the opportunity to adopt new habits and ways of being.
Titus says that in the present age – at this moment – we choose to live lives of self-control. Creating a new habit requires discipline, attention and focus.
It’s more than just making a New Year’s resolution to do things differently. For many of us, it’s noticing our hidden triggers and what stimulates the old habits.
For example: gluttony is often about avoidance of emotions. But we get stuck on thinking that gluttony is about the food. There is nothing wrong with the food. What we need to look at is our relationship with food. When we use food to cover up and avoid, we end up eating more than we need because we don’t want to feel emotionally uncomfortable. It’s easier to feel physically uncomfortable.
So, when we start to notice our triggers and what stimulates the old, then we can adopt the new.
Coming back to our example of gluttony: if I am avoiding my emotions, when I accept God’s love and grace in my life, then I can start to love myself. At this moment, I interrupt the old habit of over-eating and instead sit with the emotions and feelings that had me uncomfortable.
With this love and grace that shone down from me from above, I practice loving and accepting myself, rather than avoiding my feelings by eating them.
Let your love shine bright
Once I have mastered this, even in one area of my life, it’s possible to let that love shine bright in many other areas of my life.
Other habits are easier to break and new habits become easier to make.
As I change – emotionally, mentally, physically and spiritually – others can see the change in me.
But it all starts because of a message I received of Divine Love – acceptance of Divine Grace – that allows me to then go out, like the shepherds at Christmas, and share with others about this miracle of transformation.
How will you choose, this Christmas, to let your love shine bright in your neighbourhood and community?
When we look at the life and death of Jesus there are many lessons that stand out. But today, I invite you to reflect on these 5 ways that you can practice the presence of Spirit in your life, based on Jesus’ birth.
Today’s reading from Luke demonstrates to us the joy and rejoicing of Mary and Elizabeth, as well as John the Baptist’s reaction to first meeting Jesus while in the womb.
We’re told that Elizabeth was filled with the Holy Spirit immediately.
These are the first two ways that we reflect the spirit of Christmas and Jesus’ birth in our lives:
Rejoicing
Filled with the Spirit
Rejoicing in the Christmas Spirit
If only it were as easy as I make it sound. Rejoice!
Many try to imitate this Christmas spirit with dopamine and serotonin substitutes:
Shopping sprees
Parties
Giving gifts
Novelty: Loads of new toys and things to do
All of these mimic that feeling of rejoicing, but once Christmas is over and we enter the New Year, we slump. They were just substitutes for true joy.
True joy, on the other hand, is from the inside out. Mary responds to Elizabeth’s greeting with these words: (1:47)
my spirit rejoices in God my Savior
This is a spiritual joy, not a dopamine rush. It’s not dependent on circumstances or the latest buzz.
Before this, however, we read that Mary proclaims:
My soul magnifies the Lord.
In order to reach this level of spiritual joy, Mary focused on praise and worship. What is your focus and praise?
Where attention goes, energy flows.
Where is your focus? Does this create spiritual joy for you?
Filled with the Spirit
Secondly, as I mentioned, Elizabeth was filled with the Spirit. She had a moment of enlightenment as she spoke to Mary and blessed her.
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control… (Galatians 5: 22-23)
Is your spiritual focus on being filled with the Spirit and growing these fruit as a natural outcome of your spiritual practice?
When you squeeze a lemon, you get lemon juice. If you are squeezed and pressured in life, what naturally flows out of you? Is it love, joy, peace and patience?
It’s when you are under pressure that you naturally see what fruit you have.
And the spirit of Christmas calls us to be filled with the Spirit.
The purpose of Christ’s coming
The final three ways that we can reflect the spirit of Jesus’ birth in our lives are all related to the purpose of Christ’s coming to this world.
Hebrews 10 mentions that sacrifices and burnt offerings are not what the Creator desires to see from us. Jesus also said that he had not come to do away with the law or change it, but to fulfill it.
And yet, our sacrifices and burnt offerings are not what is desired. So, what does the Creator desire from us?
Love the Lord thy God…
Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength.
Mark 12: 30
So, what is your heart set on? What rules your emotions and feelings? Neuroscience tells us that our heart governs our desires. It’s not a rational thought governed from the mind – but rather something that is felt and hoped for.
But our mind and thoughts are also covered by this rule to Love God. It’s not just with your heart, but also with your mind. Are your thoughts governed by your love for God? What do you spend all your time thinking and worrying about?
As I said above, where attention goes, energy flows. Is your attention placed on your love of God?
Once again, we are called to love God with all our soul – it’s a spiritual love of God, not just thoughts and feelings.
Finally, there’s a physical love of God: what we actually do. Do your actions reflect your love of God?
This takes us naturally into the second part of Jesus’ teaching:
Love your neighbour…
The second is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.
Mark 12: 31
The first commandment is to love God, and the second ones tells us to love others as much as we love ourselves.
The spirit of Christmas often shows up in churches and communities as giving to those less fortunate than us. Especially in colder climates, where the homeless battle extreme cold, Christmas is a time for sharing basic necessities and life-saving goods.
But as you reflect on this season, how will you express your love for others and those around you?
As Jesus taught us, your neighbour can be anyone, including marginalised social groups or immigrants.
Thy will be done…
Perhaps the biggest challenge of the season is to accept that the real message in Christ coming to earth is these four words:
Thy will be done…
We read this in the text from Hebrews, where the author tells us
I have come to do your will…
It’s not about offerings and sacrifices, but understanding the Creator’s will in your life. Not looking at how this is expressed for the person sitting beside you, but rather accepting that your life has a plan and a purpose.
Exclusively yours.
How will you fulfill this purpose?
Are you willing to look at what this purpose for your life is and then put all of your heart and soul into living with purpose?
Is your daily prayer: “Thy will be done”?
It’s easy to get caught up in plans and executing good ideas. But are those good idea a reflection of the Creator’s will for your life? Are you in alignment with your purpose?
When you tune into your heart’s desire, what do you heart? Is your heart’s desire to live your best life for yourself? Or are you willing to focus your energy on letting your heart’s desire be what God has for you?
When you take action, who guides and leads those actions? What is the driving motivation behind you?
Reflecting the purpose of Christmas in your life
So, in these coming days, I invite each and every one of us to delve into:
Rejoicing in a life filled with the Spirit, where your heart, mind, soul and strength are focused on loving God and your neighbour as yourself. In this way, saying “Thy will be done” starts to come naturally for each of us.
4 Rejoice in the Lord always. Again I will say, rejoice!
5 Let your [a]gentleness be known to all men. The Lord is at hand.
6 Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; 7 and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. (emphasis added)
As I near the Christmas season, I am faced with various challenging situations and worries about world peace, instability and war.
Life’s challenges can rob us of joy. For example:
loss of a loved one
illness or an accident
financial woes
problems at work or in our relationships
global instability.
I struggle with rejoicing. I feel jaded and cynical about where the world is headed.
But the fruit of the Spirit include joy and peace. Anxiety and depression are not on this list.
But, I’m not told to rejoice in my circumstances or because everything is going great. I’m reminded to rejoice in the Creator. That is, to trust in Spirit’s blessings and goodness.
Today, I’m back to one of my favourite passages in James 3: “the untamable tongue”. Having control of the words of our mouth reflects fully in our relationships. We use words to build others up and encourage them, or we can tear each other down.
We are warned in the first verse of James not to presume to be teachers (those purporting spiritual authority above others), because these teachers will be judged more harshly.
We all make mistakes, especially in what we say.
A slip of the tongue for just a moment can destroy a relationship in just a few words.
No amount of saying “I’m sorry, I was angry and I didn‘t mean it” can rebuild the trust that was destroyed by our words.
Having perfect control of the tongue – to encourage others and drive their growth – is the measure of the perfect man, able to use his self-control in every way.
From Galatians, we know that one of the fruits of the Spirit is self-control:
Perfect control of your tongue is the hallmark of being filled with the Spirit.
Consider the effect of the words of a school teacher on a child and the impact this may have on them throughout their lives:
You’re useless and can’t learn anything.
Obviously, you’ll never go to University.
I believe in you! Youˋre so hard-working and putting in so much effort, youˋll definitely do great things in the future.
I know you can do this! Even though it’s been hard for you to learn these things, youˋve done a great job with this homework.
And this is even more powerful within the Church.
Imagine what happens when someone in leadership says to our youth:
You’re so rebellious, it’s impossible to teach you. There’s simply no hope for you.
With all this rebellious spirit you’ve shown, I’m sure that you will always stand tall and be strong when going against the crowd. You have the strength to be a future leader.
As we are reminded in James, a large ship is guided by a small rudder. And the tongue of those in leadership can shape the future of our Church and members.
We don’t have to be in a leadership position to use the power of the tongue.
gossip is mentioned about 133 times in the Bible
cursing shows up more than 65 times; and
complaining is mentioned more than 100 times.
Proverbs 20:19 reminds us:
A gossip betrays a confidence; so avoid anyone who talks too much.
Worse yet, those who eagerly listen to gossip are considered to be of low character. (Prov. 17:4)
A curse is calling for harm or injury to come to someone, and 1 Peter 3:10 suggest that if we love life and want to see good days, then we should guard our tongue against speaking evil and our lips from lying.
Swearing is not necessarily using curse words – in fact, consider swearing to be verbal abuse.
You’re stupid and I hope you die.
You will never amount to anything.
You’re so fat and ugly, no one will ever love you.
These are all curses, even though they don’t include any swear words. Instead, we are asked to speak positive and encouraging words to each other.
Complaining is not the same as letting people know when something is wrong. It comes from the soul and focuses on the problem, rather than on seeking solution.
This is why in verse 7 of James 3 we read:
The tongue also is a fire… It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell.
We see examples of this in every day life.
Gossip spreads like a wild fire, especially through social media and chat groups.
You’re in a meeting discussing a problem and looking for solutions: One person complains and soon ten people are complaining and the vibe gets dragged down. Soon, everyone has forgotten that the meeting was to look for solutions.
One kid in the play ground starts to bully and verbally another, and soon you have a group of kids picking on the victim.
So, what are we supposed to do?
These verses of James 3, verses 1-12 don’t really offer us the solution. They simply outline for us the power of the challenge and what happens if we fail to control the tongue.
It’s only when we get to verses 13 and following that we discover the solution:
Wisdom and understanding is shown by a good life, by deeds done in humility and the humility that comes from wisdom.
So, if we want to drive growth in our community or family, is starts individually: each one of us has to learn to control our tongue.
It’s living from the inside out – what we have on the inside will be shown to others by what we say and do.
Isaiah 50, verse 4 from this week’s lectionary reading offers the following:
To encourage those who are tired and weary.
The Lord GOD has given me a trained tongue, that I may know how to sustain the weary with a word. Morning by morning he wakens, wakens my ear to listen as those who are taught.
This is what we are asked to do.
When we use our words for encouragement and building others up, then we are living a life filled with the presence of the Divine.
For the past couple of years, I’ve chosen a Word of the Year – one value which I wish to embody in my life. It’s always been one of my values, but there’s always one that stands out more than others. For 2022, that word is Mastery:
the mastery of self (self-awareness and the resulting self-control) as well as
knowing more (knowledge and understanding) and
putting that new learning into practice.
Because to know anything is to do things differently from before.
Life management is about being well adjusted. … being able to stand against the wind of disappointment. Time is not really the important element. It is what time represents that matters. Time management is not about a list of things in order of priority that must be completed… Time management is about life management.
Given that life is mostly about intangible things, does it not make sense to learn to control them – things such as thoughts, desires, anger, curiosity, ambition, motivation, sadness, hurt and sorrow? Althought we live in a tangible world, life itself occurs within our mind, spirit and soul.
Jonar C. Nader, How to Lose Friends & Infuriate People, a controversial book for thinkers.
For me, this is the essence of what I am reminded of when I read Proverbs – self-awareness and then the option for self-control.
The wisdom of Proverbs
One of the many things that I’ve had on my “I wish I had time to do” list is to deep dive back into Proverbs. Of all the books of the Bible, this is one of the two that most resonates with me. The other one is the book of James.
Proverbs has a special place in my heart because I remember my dad reading it to me every night before bed. Occasionally, we would talk about what a verse meant. But more often than not, it was just a reading of a chapter or a portion of a chapter.
I was left with many more questions than answers.
from dictionary.com
Of course, many times, we try to read Proverbs literally, and not all of it can be understood with a literal meaning.
My experience with Proverbs is that different ones “jump out at me” at different moments in life. Moreover, I’ve interpreted them differently, depending on what I’ve been learning at the time.
As with any proverbs, many of them take time to digest and understand.
The usefulness of Proverbs
In the very first chapter of Proverbs, there is a small introduction, although there is debate as to how much of the book of Proverbs this introduction applies to.
Proverbs 1: 1-6, Amplified Bible
I find it irrelevant who the author of Proverbs was: I don’t read the book of Proverbs because of who wrote it.
Throughout my life, I’ve turned to Proverbs when I’m in turmoil. And these last three years have had their fair share of inner (and outer) turmoil.
Consider how other translations present the introduction to Proverbs:
Proverbs 1: 1-6, The Message
Proverbs 1: 1-6, King James Version
These are the wise sayings of Solomon, David’s son, Israel’s king— Written down so we’ll know how to live well and right, to understand what life means and where it’s going; A manual for living, for learning what’s right and just and fair; To teach the inexperienced the ropes and give our young people a grasp on reality. There’s something here also for seasoned men and women, still a thing or two for the experienced to learn— Fresh wisdom to probe and penetrate, the rhymes and reasons of wise men and women.
1 The proverbs of Solomon the son of David, king of Israel;
2 To know wisdom and instruction; to perceive the words of understanding; 3 To receive the instruction of wisdom, justice, and judgment, and equity; 4 To give subtilty to the simple, to the young man knowledge and discretion. 5 A wise man will hear, and will increase learning; and a man of understanding shall attain unto wise counsels: 6 To understand a proverb, and the interpretation; the words of the wise, and their dark sayings.
The place of Proverbs
Proverbs is one of the five books of Wisdom of the Bible, together with Job, Psalms, Ecclesiastes and Song of Solomon.
I find it interesting that two of these books are poetry and psalms, rather than writings of wisdom, per se. And yet, all five of the books offer unique perspectives on life and the experiences of life.
But, as you will have noticed from the introduction to Proverbs, it has lofty goals:
wisdom
wise behaviour
the discipline of wise thoughtfulness
good judgement
astute common sense
intelligent discernment
instruction
a manual for living
knowledge
understanding
to understand what life means
insight
righteousness
justice
integrity
lead others to the truth
The road to wisdom
So, over the coming weeks and months, I intend to take a new journey through Proverbs and re-examine how it impacts my life. What new wisdom can I glean from these pages?
In the exercises for week 4 of the Artist’s Way (by Julia Cameron) one of the tasks is to write your own Artist’s Prayer.
AN ARTIST’S PRAYER
O Great Creator, We are gathered together in your name That we may be of greater service to you And to our fellows. We offer ourselves to you as instruments. We open ourselves to your creativity in our lives. We surrender to you our old ideas. We welcome your new and more expansive ideas. We trust that you will lead us. We trust that it is safe to follow you. We know you created us and that creativity Is your nature and our own. We ask you to unfold our lives According to your plan, not our low self-worth. Help us to believe that it is not too late And that we are not too small or too flawed To be healed— By you and through each other—and made whole. Help us to love one another, To nurture each other’s unfolding, To encourage each other’s growth, And understand each other’s fears. Help us to know that we are not alone, That we are loved and lovable. Help us to create as an act of worship to you.
Of course, we’re now in Week 8, and I haven’t done it yet.
So, perhaps it’s time to really look at how I wish to co-create with the Creator.
Great Creator and Spirit within, I rest easy knowing that my purpose is to share my learnings and that when I lean into you, I know enough. I acknowledge and accept that all my creative urges and yearnings are Divine, So today, I offer myself into the flow of your creative energy. I open myself to co-create with Divine Love, welcoming new ideas and new ways of connecting and working with old ideas. I am willing to let go of the need to know it all now before I get started. I trust that it is safe to explore my creative yearnings, trying new methods and ways. I dare to ask that you supply all my needs: emotional, mental, creative, health, and even financial. I am learning to trust and surrender. I am perfectly made and created; I am healthy and whole. Allow me to be a vessel for your Divine and Creative love to flow to others, accepting Divine Love to fill me and overflow. Let my creativity be my act of worship. And so it is.
I took a moment today to reread one of my posts from ten years ago: The Lord is my shepherd. It was a collection of thoughts about Psalm 23 and what it means to feel safe in the presence of God.
For these last ten years, I’ve come to understand that our English Bible translation uses “the Lord” as the standard translation wherever the original used YHWH. I’ve distanced myself from the idea of God being a man sitting Santa-like on his sky-throne.
Somehow distant and looking down on us all – rather than Spirit and in each and every one of us. Over these past 22 months, I realise that what has kept me going strong is the Divine presence of inner peace, abundance, and compassion, despite living in a time of turmoil.
So, today I want to share my thoughts on what it means to allow the Infinite to flow through us as Divine Wisdom, peace and love, taking thoughts and ideas from Psalm 23.
Divine Wisdom shepherds me
One of the things about sheep and shepherds is that the sheep get used to the shepherd because the shepherd lives with them twenty-four hours a day. They recognise the shepherd by the sound of their voice and the scent.
And so, as I learn to live in the presence of the Divine, I learn to listen to that still, small voice of Divine Wisdom. It’s often hushed, although occasionally, I get a brutal shake or prod!
Shepherding is about being led, surrendering to the path of Divine Will, rather than what my ego would have me do. And when I listen and surrender, I recognise that I have everything I need.
Everything I need: all the time I could possibly need to get things done, all the love and affection that my heart desires, and all the resources that I need at this moment.
In fact, when I sit with my God Box, which I made at the beginning of this year, I am in awe! All the worries and concerns that I put in my God Box were taken care of. All of them. Not a single one of those worries came to pass this year! I took all those things that were beyond my control and simply said, “you handle this for now, and when I’m ready, gently place it on my plate to take care of”.
Resting in the presence of the Divine
Most of us remember that the shepherd makes us lie down in green pastures; there’s a lushness to this imagery. In addition to having our fill – an all you can eat banquet – do you experience the softness and gentleness of lying down and resting?
How have you rested in 2021?
Are you resting gently and deeply, or do you stay up at night with worries?
To quote my previous post on Psalm 23:
“We have found both provender and peace, rest and refreshment, serenity and satisfaction.”
In addition to surrendering to rest and relaxation, we are offered our fill of living water – to be cleansed, refreshed and revitalised.
Can you allow the Infinite to flow through you?
My soul is restored and renewed
I wear myself out trying to do it all from my own strength and under my own steam. I forget – regularly – to allow Divine Presence to flow through me and empower me. But, as I let it, my soul and spirit are restored and renewed.
All I have to do is step away from staying business – holding and grasping desperately to doing it all myself.
When I’m doing it all alone, it’s empty and incomplete. My ego’s happy – for a while until it falls and fails. Then it throws a tantrum when I realise that I am not perfect and complete unless I am open to the presence of the Divine.
I am complete when I am One with Spirit. But when I allow myself to be guided by Divine Wisdom, I find myself facing anything and everything. The path takes me back to wholeness.
But it is a soft allowing and opening up. It is surrender and trusting, which I still find challenging.
How are you allowing the Divine Creator to complete you?
A time of turmoil in the world
Walking through the valley of the shadow of death
These two years have felt like a walk through the valley of the shadow of death. The foreboding of “it’s out there” could be terrifying, and yet I have discovered this fantastic, deep well within me of inner peace. One that genuinely has surpassed all my understanding.
I know, without a doubt, that we are walking through this valley. That means that there is a light at the end: there will be a moment when we are no longer under the shadow of death.
But I feel an intense peace and calm within me. I haven’t feared for myself or those I love in these two years of uncertainty. I have felt deeply protected and shielded despite all the turmoil.
Some of the changes have been harrowing – as an introvert with a slightly extroverted child, I cannot begin to explain the challenges of two years of home-schooling while working from home. And yet, this too shall pass.
And every time she says that these have been the best two years of her life, I am blown away. In my mind, I have focused on my shortcomings rather than how resilient we have both been!
We have been abundantly protected and shielded. We’ve grown and changed with the changing times.
And in so many ways, I have been miraculously comforted and found safety.
Making time for self-care
Despite the challenges of these times – the enemies that surround us – Divine Wisdom reminds me to take time out. To sit quietly and eat calmly. To enjoy the food before me.
These past two years have been about re-encountering a relationship with gratitude and pausing, especially around food. I’ve made more time cooking and sitting down to eat, with grace before meals, rather than eating on the run.
And what I’ve realised is that this has a very practical application in our digestive system: as we switch over from “fight & flight mode” to “rest and digest”. It’s a crucial physiological distinction. Divine Wisdom reminds me regularly: stop what you’re doing and just eat. It’s okay to take time for nourishing your body without multi-tasking.
I am also reminded that I have a purpose and calling – and that does not require multi-tasking either! It’s becoming more single-minded about “the one thing” and focusing my energy and attention on what I am called to be and do.
The more I follow this, I count my many blessings! My cup indeed does run over!
Guided by Divine Wisdom, with goodness & mercy watching my back
Who has your back?
We’re promised that both goodness and mercy will follow us wherever we go. Mercy sweeps along behind me, forgiving my mistakes and weaknesses, allowing me to forgive myself.
Can I let go of the guilt and shame that I’ve carried and allow it to be swept away by goodness and mercy?
The final part of Psalm 23 reminds us that we dwell forever with Divine Presence, finally reaching that place of complete Oneness with Spirit.
I belong. I am loved and cherished, with an everlasting love.
This is what it means for Divine Wisdom to be omnipotent, omniscient and omnipresent.
Will you allow the Infinite to flow through you until you are One with Spirit?
Over recent weeks, in my healing journey, I have been examining my relationship with trust. It first came to my attention when I looked at my business decisions, especially mistakes that I have made over the past 20 years. But, in recent days, I noticed a pattern emerge.
The beauty of recognising patterns of behaviour is that it opens the door for change and transformation. What I’ve noticed is a swinging pendulum in my life between distrust and blind trust. This pattern has cost me thousands of dollars, as well as relationships and creating heartbreak.
It is in seeing my actions and omissions accurately that the doors open.
The truth sets us free.
Let me provide you with some concrete examples:
In my early business days, I hired a friend to run one of my companies. Because I was overwhelmed and swamped with the growth in business and hiring new staff, I failed to supervise her properly. She was struggling in getting everything done, and I wasn’t available to support her. I didn’t ask how things were going, instead choosing to focus exclusively on my own overwhelm. Unfortunately, while she was getting the client work done, she wasn’t invoicing the client for it! By the time I realised the mess in accounts receivable and payable, the client had accrued some $40,000.00 in services they hadn’t paid for. Thankfully, the client eventually paid all outstanding invoices. But it took years to get fully up to date, and I bore the financial brunt of being caught between suppliers and financing a client. When I’m overwhelmed, I shut down, dissociate from the present, and turn to blind trust.
In March 2009, I left on holiday for three weeks to New Zealand. I chose the dates based on the weather (end of summer) and flight costs (cheaper because summer holidays were over and it wasn’t yet Easter). I was overwhelmed and exhausted after restructuring staff following the 2008 markets crash. Unfortunately, March 31st is the end of tax season – which meant that my company tax returns were prepared and presented in my absence. The company accountant and external accountants included a refundable expense in “income”, an extra $54,000 in ghost income! As a result, my income tax bill that year was $27,000.00 when it should have been less than $9,000.00. But, you prepay taxes for the next year, based on the estimates of what you paid the previous year! So, not only was I hit with the current tax bill, but my estimated taxes for the next year were identical, giving me a tax credit for years to come. My blind trust created a substantial financial pinch.
I could provide you with many more examples in my professional life where I have distrusted, micro-managed and controlled every aspect of an employee’s performance, to those moments where I am overwhelmed and shut down, leading to no involvement or supervision at all.
Definitions
definition of Trust
Trust = firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something
definition of Distrust
Distrust = the feeling that someone or something cannot be relied upon.
Blind faith or blind trust: “unquestioning belief in something, even when it’s unreasonable or wrong”. I take it to mean “trust in spite of evidence to the contrary” or blindly ignoring evidence that perhaps they are undeserving of your complete trust.
How trauma informs our state of mind
Unfortunately, this pattern is not something I learned as an adult, and I’ve been using this pattern since early childhood. When I get overwhelmed, the easiest solution is to shut down and freeze, and this takes me into dissociation from the present moment and avoidance. In these cases, blind faith and trust in others become the only option, and I can’t trust myself.
Hypervigilance at the other end of the pendulum presents itself as distrust, micro-managing every situation as I attempt to control the outcome. Of course, this is exhausting, making me angry (an emotion that I was taught not to acknowledge as a child) and frustrated. To avoid anger, I would rebound into dissociation and shut down.
I never learned how to stay in the middle: in balance, calm and being alert. I struggle on so many levels with trust, and this shows up in my life on every level:
personal
interpersonal
professional
spiritual
I could choose to sit in victimhood: “this is how I am, because of my childhood“. But I choose not to. I started to look at my patterns as generative learning – an opportunity to grow and change. And I share these learnings with you, because I want you to recognise that you have options and choices available to you.
As I have begun to experience inner peace, the wisdom of trust has become available.
The human experiences that break trust, building distrust
Years ago, I denied being traumatised at boarding school because I wasn’t regularly beaten and abused. Anger and speaking up would earn you a beating, being labelled a Jezebel, or having a rebellious spirit.
I avoided beatings by being “a good girl”, knowing when to shut my mouth and swallowing any anger I felt. The survival skills I learned were to shut down, dissociate, and walk away. Unfortunately, those skills are not very resourceful and helpful in my life anymore.
There are many moments that I wish I were rebellious, angry & unruly. How I wish I had been the wild child that baulked the system and stood up against injustices, daring to question unfair authority. Instead, I chose the safety and security of apathy, withdrawal and indifference. Unfortunately, as an adult, I still struggle with dealing with my anger, boundaries and injustice. As a lawyer, it’s easy to stand up for others. But I shrink instead of standing up for myself. I avoid confrontations of a personal nature, even when they would clear the air.
Through it all, I am entrenched in my independence. Of course, as I know now – hyper-independence is merely a symptom of trauma: unable to ask for help because I can’t trust others. Can I even trust myself?
Taught to obey Church leaders without question:
We had verses drummed into us, which in themselves were not wrong. But was the interpretation of these verses rightly applied?
Under no circumstances were we, children, to question those in authority because they were “appointed by God”. And if God wanted to remove them for wrongdoing, then it was merely our duty to “pray about it” rather than to do anything.
Even the hymns we sang reminded us that we were to “Trust and Obey” rather than stand up for ourselves or others. Helplessness was ingrained, and anything that was not as it “should be” was “God’s will”, and we were to endure it.
Biblical teachings: the human heart
But that wasn’t the only weapon in the arsenal of submission. In reading the below verses, repeatedly we heard: “The heart is deceitful above all things”. Divine Justice prevailing, to each according to their ways, patterns and actions received little mention. Instead, beatings were justified because our hearts were deceitful.
Those in power were above all of that.
How can I trust myself if I believe that my heart is deceitful? What relationship or trust can I build with others if they are devious and incurably sick in their hearts?
If you question what I am telling you, you lack faith. Instead, you should “pray about it” and “trust God” to solve this for you.
If the prevalent attitude about human nature is one of sin and depravity, then there is no trust.
Maureen Murdock, “The Heroine’s Journey”
Divide and conquer has worked for centuries, both within the church and politics, and it’s as quickly at work today as it always has been. Even today, we hear who to distrust and then expected to place blind trust in authority.
But blind faith means that you have no ownership of your spiritual path or will. It relieves you of responsibility, creating victimhood. And victims are powerless, easy to manipulate.
I am so grateful for learning a new way: what it means to have a healthy trust.
As much as I would like to say that my journey back to trust began with trusting Divine Presence in my life, that’s not the truth of my journey. My transformation started with an exploration of self-awareness for personal growth, and spiritual healing occurred after learning and personal development.
The first step back to trust was:
Know thyself.
In noticing my patterns of distrust and blind trust, I could explore what healthy trust means. Emotional and spiritual healing have come together as I worked with forgiveness of myself and others.
My trust in the Divine grows as I let go of my need to micro-manage and control every tiny detail. And in living in the Spirit, I trust my insight and intuition to build relationships with others.
What does it mean to trust me, others and Divine Presence?
The elements of trust
Trust is not something we do from a place of apathy, withdrawal or dissociation. It is active and engaged: trust requires relaxed courage, curiosity, and calm presence.
According to Grant Soosalu & Marvin Oka, in their book mBraining, they identify the four elements of trust (learning to trust yourself):
Communication
Compassion
Consistency
Competency
Other authors and writers similarly identify the basic requirements of trust as:
Competence
Character
Caring
Credibility
Reliability
Intimacy
Self-Orientation
Integrity
Benevolence
Ability
These authors point towards the same essential characteristics and requirements of trust. As difficult as it is, I have tried to group these together in a simple explanation:
Communication:
Is all about listening as well as sharing
As Covey says: “Seek first to understand, and then to be understood”
To build trust, it’s necessary to voice your wants, needs, desires and motives. It’s okay to have self-interest, but be open about what those interests are
“intimacy refers to your willingness to share appropriate information about the things that truly matter.”
Trust begins when we are open & transparent – even with ourselves
It is recognising my value and the value of others, leading to genuine empathy & understanding
Clear & heartfelt commitment to my personal wellbeing and the wellbeing of others
Only then can we build trusted relationships
Actions – Consistency & Character:
In order to build trust, there has to be congruence and alignment between what I say and do! This applies as much to promises I make to myself as what I promise others.
Predictable, reliable, & full of integrity
Loyalty, honour & duty
Respect and selfless service
Oriented to values and the vision – not just selfish interest
Clear set of principles, so you can be on the same wavelength
Can be counted upon
Ability – Competency & Credibility:
Mastery – skilled & knowledgeable
Has a domain of expertise and performs their functions well
Will speak up and give their point of view on the matter at hand from a point of knowledge
Stays current & up to date
Self-assured in their competence
Demonstrating progress towards goals
Emotional and spiritual healing: rebuilding trust
When I look back at boarding school and these four qualities of trust, I find those in authority sorely lacking. If they had known better, they would have done better. But they lacked communication skills; they were authoritarian rather than compassionate. When I look at their actions, looking for consistency and character, I find them predictable, but I couldn’t count on them. They were not always congruent in what they said and did, as the rules did not apply equally to all. Perhaps worst of all, they were not skilled and knowledgeable, although they believed themselves to be.
We were left with an expectation of blind faith and trust in authority because the essential elements of a healthy trust were missing.
Self-awareness
I now recognise that I have a proactive role in building relationships: I listen to the desires of my heart and trust my gut. I stay engaged and curious, rather than withdrawing. Instead of seeing myself as helpless and needing to be rescued, I recognise that I must play a part in building my future.
True faith is an inner alignment with yourself and with God. It’s a balance of trusting the universe to provide and doing your part to co-create with the Creator.
Letting the Infinite flow in my life: rebuilding trust
The road back to faith, trust and hope is uneven and rocky. Sometimes, it’s the procession of three steps forward and two steps back as I fall into habitual patterns of blind trust or distrust.
I am learning to communicate and listen. As I consistently practise the presence of the Divine in my life, I hear the small, still voice of Spirit. It requires that I quiet my mind – that I sit in Silence and allow my heart to be still. It’s a daily practice in which my mastery builds up each day.
I have to choose to be open and transparent; it doesn’t happen naturally. There are times I want to shut down, and I have to make a conscious choice to be vulnerable and compassionate. When I commit to building relationships with myself, others, and the Divine, trusting relationships open up for me.
I sit in the Silence each morning to reconnect and refill my heart with the faithful love of Divine Presence, for I trust in Divine Love. Each morning I listen to how I should walk and allow my Spirit to submit fully to Spirit
Ps. 143: 8
My understanding of what it means to rely on the Divine entirely has changed: it is no longer helplessness. I am not frozen in fear, unable to think logically or approach life with curiosity. I’m not keeping myself safe by being emotionally disengaged or apathetic. Instead, I am choosing to be fully present and connected.
From this place, I still choose trust, faith and hope.
Place your trust in the Eternal; rely on the Divine completely; never depend upon your own ideas and inventions. Give the Great Creator the credit for everything you accomplish, trusting that Divine Love will smooth out and straighten the road that lies ahead.
Prov. 3: 5-6
Other posts your might find interesting on Blind Faith:
I recently saw an image posted on social media: “Worry is worshipping the problem”. And without a doubt, I believe that where attention goes, energy flows. I have to regularly stop myself and ask: “Where are you focussing your attention – on the problem or the solution?”
More than this, however, I bring myself back to the reminder that I live in the presence of the Divine. And if I claim to be practising Divine Presence in my life, how is it expressed when faced with problems or challenges?
Am I keeping my attention and focus on the Great Creator, allowing creative solutions to flow to me?
When my mind is focused and stayed on the Divine, perfect peace holds me. I trust in both the process and the outcome.
The effects of worry
When we stay worried – in a stressed state – this impacts us on several levels. One of the primary organs hit by stress and worry is your heart, including your arteries and blood vessels. Consequently, your heart beats faster and harder, resulting in inflamed arterial walls. This inflammation impacts your health:
hardening of the arteries
unhealthy cholesterol levels
high blood pressure
heart attacks
stroke.
Even in the Bible, we read:
Anxiety weighs down the heart
Proverbs 12:25
And again:
So then, banish anxiety from your heart and cast off the troubles of your body
Ecclesiastes 11:10
Other impacts of anxiety:
When we are anxious and worrying, it’s more than just our heart that gets hit. Blood sugar levels also rise, with the need for more energy caused by adrenaline and then cortisol. We don’t burn off this extra energy; we have passive worry and anxiety. So, those high blood sugar levels, intended to help us escape danger, stay in the body without being burned up for energy.
Our worry also impacts our immune system, weakening it. Our bodies struggle to defend against illness and disease. Additionally, we contend with gut and digestive issues. That knot in your stomach becomes an ulcer or indigestion. Your worries might even impact bowel motility.
We hold this worry and anxiety in our bodies, as well as impacting the central nervous system. To cope, we create:
eating disorders – not eating or over-eating;
bad habits & addictions, and
insomnia and disturbed sleep patterns.
Worry also impacts our relationships, job performance and the ability to make decisions.
Despite knowing all this: we continue to worry and focus on the problem, not the solutions.
The problem with staying anxious & worried:
Anxiety is a state of distraction and prolonged suffering. Our worrying creates a physical and emotional response, in the present moment, regarding a future possibility. It is not an inevitable future outcome but uncertain. You are trying to predict the future and possibly are catastrophising. It may not turn out as you create it in your imagination. And it is indeed not happening right now.
Worry stems from fear. Typically, this is our fear of not being enough or having enough talent, resources, or abilities to face life’s challenges.
This anxiety creates less focus, where you can no longer concentrate on the task at hand. You might become irritable and easily thrown off balance. It’s easy to become disengaged, showing up either as fight and flight or being withdrawn.
Worry reduces your ability to weed out distractions, making it easy to fall into:
social media
news
a train of worrying thoughts
meaningless tasks & chores that could wait
All of this comes together to impair decision-making.
Chasing safety
Unfortunately, part of your brain got unplugged and disengaged by worry! Worry and anxiety lead you towards what might seem (from a limited perspective) the safest choice. But the safest option is not always the best solution.
Good decision-making requires flexibility in your thinking and looking at the problem and solutions from various perspectives. Do you have the ability to look above and beyond the present moment and conditions?
Weigh up the consequences
Plan for the future
Use logical processing
Another challenge when you are worried is that you might not talk about your fears. It’s more than asking for Divine help and guidance. Sometimes you need to talk to people. Perhaps you ask the Divine to get the right people to show up for you.
Finally, when we are worried and overwhelmed, we respond in two opposing ways:
We consider too few options and become fixated.
We overthink all the available options under the sun, a scattered mind that is unable to focus. Because there are too many options, we get overwhelmed.
In both cases, we procrastinate. Then, as we run out of time, we pick the first solution because we want to escape the overwhelming feelings. Of course, if we had proactively studied the options earlier, a different outcome would emerge.
Where are you focused when times are hard?
The Divine invites us to trust: to set a divine intention and then hold that intention as being true. Perhaps the intention is as simple as:
I am capable of making good decisions, guided by Spirit.
We challenge the worry and anxiety and get present in this moment – here and now. Right now, I am safe and secure.
The purpose of doing this is to focus our energy and attention on the direction we should go. Worry tricks us into avoiding what we don’t want: any direction is a good direction, as long as it takes me away from ____. A good decision, on the other hand, takes us in the bearing we want to go. We have a purpose, and we turn towards our goal.
Watch your heart with all diligence: from your heart flows the spring of life.
It’s easy to get caught up worrying about all the things that are beyond our control. But it is when we focus our attention on what we can control that we get anything done.
Things I can control:
my attitude
my choice to get organised
where to spend and invest my time and energy
time management
how I respond to the challenge before me
how I communicate with others
whether or not I choose to share with others and ask for help
You control whether or not you make a plan, getting specific about which steps to take in the coming days. You put time and energy into this and what you can do and who you can talk to.
Alternatively, sometimes the best choice is to take a break:
meditate
pray
exercise.
The God Box
Everything else – beyond your control – where do you put that?
I put those things in my “God Box”. The God Box is a little cardboard box, hand painted and decorated on the shelf above my desk. All my worries get written on a bit of paper, folded up, and placed in the box.
I place those worries out of sight and mind. At the end of the year, as part of my end of year routine, I’ll paint a new one for 2022 with little miss and we’ll burn the 2021 box and say farewell to the worries we put away.
The power of holding an intention with faith
As a child, my prayers to God were much like asking Santa Claus at Christmas. There was wishing as well as negotiation. As an adult, however, I believe in personal responsibility and accountability for an outcome. And yet, I believe in miracles.
I believe in “be anxious for nothing”. And so, in every situation, I hold an intention and gratitude in my heart. I present every request for my highest good to the Divine Creator. And as a result, my heart is flooded with a peace that I cannot begin to comprehend.
It’s more than a helpless prayer.
It is a proactive prayer, one in which I believe that what I have asked for will come to pass, and therefore it is safe to take steps forward on that path!
Believe that you have received it and it will be yours!
But it is asking with single-mindedness, without a shadow of a doubt. Can you believe that Divine Love cradles you? Are you confident that when you hold an intention for the highest good and possible outcome – daring to pour your time and energy into achieving this – it will come to pass?
It’s more than just faith: aligned action.
They say that if you want to walk on water, you’ve got to start by hopping out of the boat! While that might take the example to an extreme, for me, that is the definition of faith and believing: your actions fully align with what you profess to believe.
My biggest mistakes have been made in blind faith: the faith of sitting waiting without any corresponding action.
My definition of blind faith: I expect a perfect crop without having planted any seeds, watered or weeded. Unless I have grounds to believe that someone else actually planted, watered and weeded, that’s merely blindness. It’s not faith.
Faith is stepping out and putting my plan into effect.
Faith believes that the Divine accompanies me on every step of my path. It allows me to trust that I can listen to the still, small voice of Spirit, make a plan, and then take action.
Keeping the faith that what you’ve planted will grow
Sometimes, faith shows up in patience. Trust is waiting for results without growing anxious. It is confidence in the results that I hope for, resting in the assurance of what I cannot yet see.
Having faith means I am filled with joy and peace as I sit trusting in the Divine. It is overflowing with hope, knowing that the power of Spirit fuels me.
My attention, time, and energy focus on doing what I can. I let go of all aspects beyond my control. I focus on the peace that passes understanding because I place my attention on Divine Love.
We say that God is love, and by this, we typically accept that Divine Love is the law. We see the Divine as the embodiment of love; it is the very nature of the Divine. This love permeates all of creation, present in every one of us.
So, for example, we read in 1 John that anyone who does not love does not know the Divine because Divine Love is the very nature and essence of goodness.
Do you base your love for others on an expectation of reciprocity? Love based on expectations becomes a business deal – if you do this for me, I will love you. How could you make Divine Love an article of commerce? God’s pure love can only flow from a pure heart. It’s impossible to say that you are full of Divine Presence and not overflow with love.
The beatitudes remind us, “Bless those that curse you”.
When we bless, we invoke good upon, calling forth Divine Love. This power of blessing imparts the quickening of spiritual power: it produces growth and increases. It is the very power of multiplication.
A curse, on the other hand, is to affirm evil for or onto something. You might understand this as the removal of Divine Presence. A curse wishes upon others that they not bring forth spiritual good through Divine Love.
When we curse those who curse us, we start from a place of ego: taking upon ourselves the decision to remove Divine Love and Divine Presence from the equation. We punish tit-for-tat, diminishing the spiritual power that produces growth and increase. Because of our pain, we strike out to cause pain to another.
How do you speak up?
But while your ego may be satisfied, what good has this done for you or another?
Why speak kindly about those to talk badly about you?
Perhaps your natural response is to complain and play the victim. Yet, each time you retell the story of how they wronged you, you replay the emotions and feelings in your body. You relive the moment, over and over again. Our bodies are constantly in tune with these emotions: what are you creating in your health and well-being as you replay and relive a past scenario?
Our stress doesn’t happen “out there”. It is what happens within your mind and your body. How you respond matters: this is the energy that you mirror into the world. It’s the very same energy that will come back to you. In the same way that you can be sure that another person will reap what they sow – you will reap what you sow. You reap the rewards of your thoughts and your words.
How you do anything is how you do everything.
There is no better motivation to speak kindly about others than neuroplasticity! How you respond now is writing neural pathways in your brain. You can self-train and entrain yourself in how to respond.
Most importantly, these same neural pathways become your inner voice and inner critic. They become the automated response in similar situations.
How would you like to entrain yourself to respond in moments of being attacked and stressed in the future?
Finally, consider who is listening and watching you. If you curse those that curse you: who is hearing you do this? Perhaps your children are watching you. Is this what you want them to learn in life?
Or perhaps, you live the Christian life and want your life to be a beacon of light for others. If you claim to love God and yet do not show this in how you respond in everyday life, what example are you showing the world?
Divine Presence is an Inside Job
Transformation is not just what comes out of your mouth or the words that others hear. It is also your thoughts and feelings. So, if you are not feeling up to blessing someone that cursed you, take a moment to sit with your reaction. What is going on inside of you?
Is this about you and an experience from the past you have yet to heal?
Or perhaps, it’s a pattern with this person that repeats, and you have failed to set in place healthy boundaries.
On the other hand, it may simply be a reflection of the state of your relationship with this person.
As you sit with the inner awareness, take time to notice whether you have an overdue conversation with this person. What do you need to clarify or change? Is this a relationship that you can heal?
Patterns of pain
Alternatively, you might notice that your pain is unrelated to this person and what they said to you. What pattern of pain or hurt has this situation shone a light on that hasn’t healed? Is there forgiveness work that you have outstanding?
It is often the case that you remember the pain from your childhood that you have swept under the mat or rationalised. For example, it may well be that a parent, teacher or family member spoke in this way to you, and you felt helpless to respond.
Now, as an adult, you feel the anger of how they mistreated you. A part of you, because you understand that they were doing the best they could, perhaps has already said, “It’s okay, I understand”. But the very fact that you feel triggered sheds light on the healing work you have outstanding.
Will you take this opportunity to go within?
Divine Love often brings people into our lives momentarily to allow us to heal those parts of us that we are overlooking. It’s like a pumice stone that helps us slough off the old skin on the soles of our feet. In the same way, through these healing opportunities, we slough off the deadwood of our soul.
What about this person or situation is truly bothering you?
In what ways did they rub you up the wrong way?
Was it a particular word or phrase that they used?
Maybe it was the tone of their voice?
What about their opinion or comments is vital to you?
As you take time in the silence to consider this person or situation, do you notice a characteristic that you have avoided working on yourself?
Your gratitude: take a moment to thank this person for the opportunity they have given you to go within.
Divine Love flows
If you take a lemon and squeeze it, you expect to get lemon juice.
If you are walking along with your mug of coffee, and someone bumps into you, causing you to spill it, what you will spill is coffee.
That is what you carried in your coffee mug.
So, when you are squeezed or bumped: does Divine Love flow from you? If anything other than Divine Love flows from you, start at the top and reread it all.
The person cursing you is an opportunity to go within. How you do anything – like how you respond when bumped – is how you do everything.
The only thing that can flow out of you is what fills you. Does your cup overflow with Divine Love and inner peace?
Where attention goes, energy flows.
You get to choose where to focus your attention any time another person attacks you. Will you focus on that person and what they have done? Will you choose to be the victim and replay the scenario over in your mind or with others?
Or will you choose the path of healing?
Every interaction with others is an opportunity to notice where you have blocks to the flow of Divine Love in your life. Humility and vulnerability allow us to accept “I am a work in progress”. But it requires that you be open to seeing and attending.
What does Divine Presence require of you today?
Bless those that curse you
Could you bless this person and thank them for holding up a mirror for you to look at yourself thoroughly?
Every person you meet reflects your stage on this journey of life and personal transformation. How does Divine Love overflow through your life? Does it seep out when life squeezes you? Does it spill out if you get bumped?
Divine Love is the law:
Love the Great Creator with all your heart, soul and mind; and
Love your neighbour as yourself.
This is what makes it possible to bless those that curse you.
Divine Presence: Letting the Infinite flow in my life 